Managing, Breathing, Functioning?

All words that I find hard to comprehend sometimes, because each of these can be a struggle. The last one is tricky, I appear functioning which isn’t necessarily great because its usually when I am struggling the most. I almost go into auto pilot when i’m struggling, its like a subconscious switch that turns on and I pretend and act like everything is okay, a little to well.

Managing, we say we manage but that usually comes as a loss to oneself. Trying to manage to go to work and perform at work, there isn’t really anything in place for me to manage my mental health and life outside of that. My energy gets sucked by trying my best to ‘peform’ at work and through the performance of ‘everything is okay’ at work. It’s not how I want to live and impacts my mental illness a lot.

Breathing. Sometimes we can take all the deep breaths in the world but anxiety and panic attacks have a mind of their own. At times I need to be told to breathe and keep reminding myself that we can all take a moment. We don’t have to run and if someone expects us to be pumped at 100 24/7, say no and take a breath.


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